(Editor’s note: This is Pt. 2 of a two-part post about growing up as a cross-cultural kid. You can jump to Pt. 1 here.)
In Part 1 of this post, I discussed what it means to be a cross-cultural kid (aka a CCK), the main types of CCKs, some personal examples and some of the pros and cons of a cross-cultural life. In this post, I will talk about the long-term effects of cross-cultural experiences and what you can do to optimize the CCK life (for your kids and for yourself).
Is being a cross-cultural kid all sweetness and light? Nope. Cross-cultural kids (CCKs) often face challenges related to identity and belonging – pretty big issues, if you ask me!
First, there’s the whole “Where is home?” question, which can be difficult to answer. For a cross-cultural kid, home is often not a place but a set of people or experiences. Second, there’s the inevitable identity crisis.
Cross-cultural kids tend to have a sense of “otherness” wherever they are. Sometimes they are so ‘third culture’ that they miss out on what people from their first or second culture take for granted.
People, places, local slang and classic experiences
For me, this cross-cultural otherness manifested very clearly wherever I happened to be. Growing up in Greece, I was frequently referred to as the “Amerikanaki” (the little American). When I went to the U.S. for all my holidays and later for university, I was constantly referred to as “the Greek girl.” While it can be fun to have people view you as a sort of exotic creature, it can also be a burden, especially when all you want is to blend in and belong somewhere.
Another blessing and burden that a cross-cultural kid experiences is having friends who come and go. Yay for the opportunity to visit friends abroad in the future! Boo for the sadness of missing your close friends because you or they had to move away. Thank goodness for email and social media, which help us all stay at least partially connected.
Expats with children often feel excitement but also concerns around matters of language and culture as they settle into a new country. Living abroad can be both amazing and intense for adults, as well as children and teens.
However, it is generally agreed that experiencing cross-cultural life in one’s formative years has much more of an impact – both good and bad – on an individual.
The effects of cross-cultural living are profound and long-lasting
The good news is that your culturally hybrid kiddo is likely to become:
- tolerant,
- open-minded,
- adaptable,
- sensitive,
- a seasoned traveler, and
- able to build strong cultural bridges for themselves and others.
The bad news ….
- Your child might feel cross-culturally confused at times.
- They will almost certainly grapple with some cross-cultural identity confusion as well.
- Your kiddo might experience deep sadness due to the grief of frequent goodbyes.
- They might have difficulty deciding on personal values, religious views, and politics due to exposure to so many cross-cultural viewpoints.
What can we do as parents or guardians to encourage the positive aspects of cross-culturalism while also not losing our family grounding?
- Mark celebrations from your home country as well as those in the local culture. Also, get curious about the traditions of any other cross-cultural people you meet.
- If you have very young children, consider sending them to a local school. Very young kids can pick up languages quite easily, and that helps a lot with cross-cultural integration. However, be sure to keep them up to scratch with English or your own language, depending on your future plans and options.
- If you have older children or teens, take a conversational language class or private language lessons with them and help each other practice that local language. It can help kids to see that they aren’t the only ones making an effort to become part of their new cross-cultural community.
- Invite neighborhood families who have kids of similar ages to your home. Making friends with locals is a super effective way to feel happy and connected in a new place.
Note: In bigger cities, especially, it isn’t too hard to get into a nice, comfy expat circle and rarely feel the need to plunge into the local culture, but what a shame that would be. Though it can be great to make friends with other expats, to really experience a place, you need to dip into local life frequently, especially if work and school environments are already international.
- Read books, watch movies, and tell stories about your country of origin.
- Cook your favorite dishes to bring a taste of home to your new residence.
- Encourage children to keep in touch with friends from their previous school and neighborhood.
- Teach them what a pen pal is and suggest they describe the new culture to their friends and send relevant photos of their new country. Schedule visits back home when possible so they can spend time with their old friends.
Living in Greece or planning to? Want your kids to reap the benefits of cross-culturalism?
Here are a few ideas for immersing your kids (and yourself) in Greek culture:
- Take a Greek cooking class and invite your new neighbors over for a meal. They will appreciate the effort (no matter how it turns out) and will surely bring a bottle of wine or a dessert to show their appreciation.
- Name days are a big thing here—bigger than birthdays, actually! Find your name or the closest thing to it on the list, and be sure to treat your friends, neighbors, and colleagues to a sweet treat on that day. Also, don’t forget to acknowledge other people’s names!
- Learn some traditional Greek dances. They are fun, the folk costumes are incredible, and you can practice your new skills at a wedding or a local church festival, especially in more rural communities where traditional dancing is a must.
- Take part in the annual Carnival festivities (called Apokries). These celebrations precede Clean Monday, which is the first day of Orthodox Lent. Wine, dance, masks, carnival floats and pagan rituals abound – what’s not to love?
- Read some Greek mythology with your kids and take them to some of the archaeological sites. Be sure to start or finish these outings with a visit to a taverna or a beach. Yummy food and swimming can be found within close proximity to most archaeological sites, which will ensure that even the kids who find ancient history to be super boring will have some nice memories of the day.
Good luck to you and your little cross-cultural globetrotters!
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Read more about Greece here in Dispatches’ archives.
- Take a Greek cooking class and invite your new neighbors over for a meal. They will appreciate the effort (no matter how it turns out) and will surely bring a bottle of wine or a dessert to show their appreciation.
- Name days are a big thing here—bigger than birthdays, actually! Find your name or the closest thing to it on the list, and be sure to treat your friends, neighbors, and colleagues to a sweet treat on that day. Also, don’t forget to acknowledge other people’s names!
- Learn some traditional Greek dances. They are fun, the folk costumes are incredible, and you can practice your new skills at a wedding or a local church festival, especially in more rural communities where traditional dancing is a must.
- Take part in the annual Carnival festivities (called Apokries). These celebrations precede Clean Monday, which is the first day of Orthodox Lent. Wine, dance, masks, carnival floats, and pagan rituals abound—what’s not to love?
- Read some Greek mythology with your kids and take them to some of the archaeological sites. Be sure to start or finish these outings with a visit to a taverna or a beach. Yummy food and swimming can be found within close proximity to most archaeological sites, which will ensure that even the kids who find ancient history to be super boring will have some nice memories of the day.
A Pittsburgher by birth, Christina T. Hudson is also half Greek and has – so far – spent most of her life in Athens, the chaotic but captivating capital city of Greece.
